No wedding can be without ushers or witnesses, just like without a bride and a groom. It is often difficult for couples to choose which people to invite to take on this honorable responsibility. Does it have to be a couple in a relationship or can it also be the bride's best friend and the groom's best friend? Is it allowed to choose presenters whose everyday life goes by in a hurry, and, ultimately, how to understand whether the people you choose will be able to understand your needs and be on the same page with you - LĪGAVĀM sought answers to these and other questions.

Host vs. witnesses

Let's start with the fact that the role of conductors nowadays has transformed and acquired a new status. It can be divided into several types - ushers - wedding organizers and ushers - witnesses. Ushers as organizers are the most traditional of usher statuses, comparable to the role of a wedding agency. It is usual for the conductors to be people close to the couple, often it can be a married couple who, with their life experience, are a role model for the newlyweds.

Nowadays, however, this is no longer such a strict criterion for the choice of presenters - they can also be close friends, not always a married couple.

On the other hand, witnesses are two people who confirm the conclusion of marriage with their presence and signature. Witnesses must be of legal age - this is the only condition in national legislation regarding the selection of witnesses. Witnesses are most often chosen in weddings organized by wedding agencies, as professionals replace the usual functions of ushers, while witnesses have a symbolic role. The wedding decorator and organizer Iluta Piternika / MintDeco indicates that if a couple has decided that they will entrust the function of more witnesses to the ushers at their wedding, then it must be discussed with the couple themselves. "I have often come across the fact that the young couple, when addressing the ushers, tell them - you won't have to do anything, but after the wedding they themselves are disappointed that they didn't expect anything special from the usher," says Iluta.

The decision must be thought out

Wedding organizer Gunta Skalberga / Pop Up Sense states that first of all, each couple must understand what they need - two people who will act as witnesses at the wedding or ushers who will deal with both the organization of the wedding and be witnesses. In the first case, they can also be the bride's best friend or, for example, a sister and someone close to the groom. Traditionally, so much is not expected from the witnesses, that is, they will not fulfill the duties of the organizers. "If, however, you want to entrust the organization of the wedding to the ushers, then I think it would be better to choose a family or a couple, because it is undeniably a very big job. It is necessary that these people understand each other well, because during the whole process it will be necessary for them to work as a family.

The choice of ushers should be taken seriously, especially if you want to celebrate your wedding anniversary with them in the years to come.

The couple should consider whether these people could still be in their lives in 10 years. Of course, it cannot be said unanimously, but it can definitely be felt. The main rule is that this decision should be well thought out, not a momentary weakness," believes Gunta Skalberga. She also advises to think about and evaluate the character traits of these specific people. If these people have a very busy everyday life, lack creativity and are not good at organizational tasks or time planning, then it would be cruel to both them and yourself to entrust them with this responsibility. "You should choose people with whom you look in the same direction as carriers," she is convinced. Gunta.

It is preferable to choose a couple that you perceive as a role model both in life and in relationships.

It can be a married couple with more experience who will be able to fulfill a kind of advisory function in later years. Also, brides often choose their sisters as bridesmaids, as they are sure that they will be able to feel what the bride wants to experience on her special day.

Must also be able to pronounce delicate questions

Iluta Piternika / MintDeco indicates that it is risky to choose a couple who recently had a baby as carriers. "Such a host mother cannot be actively involved in the organization and management of the wedding, because she probably has to feed the little one every two hours. This means that the overall plan and scenario of the day must be created taking into account these important needs. And this in turn means that the host father will be alone in many pictures and activities. In such cases, it is also necessary to hire additional nannies or invite nannies to the wedding, who help the hosts with looking after the little one," says Iluta. If, however, you have decided to invite a couple with small children as ushers, then all these things, no matter how delicate they may be, must be discussed. Like the budget issue in organizing a wedding.

"The issue of the budget must be openly discussed with the conductors, because it is no secret that there will be a relatively large financial involvement from their side in the organization of the wedding.

The couple must understand that it is not correct to set broad wishes for other people's budget, therefore the financial side is a matter that should be clear from the very beginning," assured Gunta Skalberga.