There is no need to fear conflicts and disputes . Constructive argument is a valuable tool, the art of communication, how to reveal one's most authentic feelings and thoughts to the other, to listen and get to know the other, as well as rekindle relationship entanglements if we come to them. Holding a grudge inside will not lead to anything good. Disputes are necessary and important in relationships and cohabitation, the only difference is how healthy we are at solving conflicts.

Strong partnership

Often such noble terms as respect and love that we all say are the most important relationships cornerstones, can sound like an empty sound if we don't dig into what they really mean. We tend to misunderstand love. It is not a passionate and unhappy rampage.

Real and true love brings peace and security.

Through this true loving of the other person, we provide a sense of security and confidence that we can solve everything, and together there is strength. Also with respect - it means letting the other person be, letting them make their own choices and accepting that the thoughts and opinion may differ, but that doesn't mean it's worse. Respect through listening, acceptance and acceptance, simply letting it be - this is the art of communication and healthy arguing between two adults and mature people. Not more and more insistently spreading your righteousness towards the other person, flattening his will and desire share and seek compromise less and less, but allow to express your vision without reproach. Give everyone their time and the opportunity to express yourself by listening and without interrupting.

Causes and effects

If you have been in a relationship for a short time, you may not yet have learned the causes of each other's behavior patterns. Basically they come from families, from what patterns we have observed in childhood. It's great if your loved one has experienced different cultures, seen different families of friends and relatives, appreciating how different these relationship patterns are. But if we take as the standard framework of the example of their parents, which may not have been the most successful... Unfortunately, unplanned learned behaviors the patterns will carry over to our relationships as well, unless we consciously approach our behavior analysis.

The fastest way to see your causes and then learn to analyze yourself without the help of specialists, of course, there is a systematic visit to a psychologist or psychotherapist. If that's not your thing, there are books and inspiring, informative online courses, lectures and master classes. Whatever tool is right for you, the goal is one is to know yourself. By getting to know ourselves, we will also be able to solve the conflict in an incomparably more constructive and respectful way, to become more empathetic towards the other, not just letting your seemingly uncontrollable impulsiveness run wild.

Couples counseling

If the conflict in the relationship is so intense that you feel that you will not go through it on your own, and you simply you each speak your own language, no matter how hard it is to admit it, it's clear that you don't even really hear each other the last moment to turn for help from the outside. Relationship specialist, family or couple psychotherapist and relationship coach is professionals who will be able to see stumbling blocks in your communication and help you relearn how to listen each other. And in this case, the help of a neutral professional is really very important, because friends or relatives will always be emotionally attached to you and will interpret the problematic situation through the prism of their personal emotions.

Find the most suitable service for you here: RELATIONSHIP COACH , SELF-GROWTH

Author of the article: IEVA KRASTIņA

Photo: NIRAV PHOTOGRAPHY

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