When planning a wedding, one of the most important things to decide is how many guests you want to see. In order to decide this, in turn, it will be necessary to answer several uncomfortable questions, for example, is it correct not to invite those family members, colleagues or friends who are not close to the couple on a daily basis.

LĪGAVĀM seeks the answer to the question of where duty and courtesy end and the couple's own choice begins.

Who pays, orders music

Regardless of the size of the wedding or the chosen style, it often requires a relatively large financial investment. That is why there is a saying - who pays, he orders music . On average, hosting one guest at a wedding can cost between 50-100 euros for a couple, so it's enough to think carefully about who to invite and what not.

However - is it allowed? Can you not invite an uncle to your wedding, who, as usual at all family events, drinks a little too much and causes a scandal? Can you not invite cousins ​​and cousins ​​you haven't seen in years? Will it be okay not to send an invitation to your parents' best friends, whom you visited a lot as a child? 

The answer is - yes. It is the couple's special day, and it should be something they have not only dreamed of, but can afford financially.

Will not receiving an invitation cause a split in the family?

The very idea that you should celebrate one of the most special days of your life with people you don't like or haven't seen in years doesn't seem right.

On the other hand, if one of the family members does not receive the expected invitation, it can cause even more division in the family. In such situations, the couple should ask themselves several questions.

1. First, is it worth not inviting a family member you don't want, even if that person's or someone else's feelings might be hurt?
2. Secondly, you need to understand how often your paths will cross in the near or distant future (at a family event, etc.) and how comfortable or, on the contrary, uncomfortable you will feel in such a situation. .

If none of these questions give you unnecessary thought, then this is another proof that you have made the right decision

When deciding not to invite a close relative to your wedding (sometimes it can be parents, sisters and brothers), you should expect that not all people around you will understand it. It may seem impolite to someone, but incomprehensible to someone else. However, this should be taken into account and you should not base your final decision on other people's opinions.

What to do if parents pay for the wedding?

Of course, the situation is a bit different in the case where all or part of the wedding costs are also covered by the parents. In that case, they could also set their own requirements for both the wedding and the list of invited guests.

Wedding organizer and decorator Iluta Piternika / MintDeco indicates that in such a case, it should be discussed with the parents from the very beginning, whether the young couple can decide all wedding organizational issues themselves, despite the fact that they are paying for the celebration. "Here, too, the visions of the generations may differ, how a wedding should take place, what should be eaten, where it should be celebrated, what music should be played and what guests should be invited. It would be good if the bride and groom's vision of the wedding coincided with the vision of the parents. Otherwise, a situation may arise where the young couple agreed to a wedding idea just out of politeness, but then they themselves were saddened by it.

And it is always good to honestly answer the question of whether you want to see your parents' friends, colleagues and distant relatives at your wedding, just because the parents are paying for part of the evening of the celebration," says Iluta.

Colleagues - yes or no?

Work colleagues are one of those categories that could be the most thought-provoking. If you work in a large team, couples often choose not to invite any colleagues. If, however, you choose to invite some and not some, it should be done as correctly as possible - especially without talking about it much during work and without advertising it. It is the same with the other halves of colleagues - in this case it would be permissible to invite colleagues without companions, but if you specify in the invitation that the arrival can be accompanied by a significant other, then such a rule should be applied to all invited colleagues, unless one is specifically singled out.

On the other hand, those friends of yours who are not in a serious relationship and know the other wedding guests well, will definitely not get over the fact that their invitation does not indicate the arrival with a companion. For your friends, it will be nice to be together and have a great time with your friends, because you don't have to worry about them not having anything to do.

PHOTO: ANNIE VELDRE , CLYDE GROSS ,  MICK SCHOOL ,