The time has come when autumn evenings and the thirst for knowledge invite you to learn something new. We're lifelong learners, but when we're in a relationship and doing it together for a healthy romantic relationship, it's doubly powerful.

Let's look at ideas for couples, how to develop and what to learn together!

Online courses and video lectures about relationships

We are taught many things at school, but essential skills that are decisive in human life are not taught. We often enter romantic relationships half-baked - with knowledge and stereotypes that we have acquired by consciously and unconsciously observing our parents' relationships, with what we have experienced in other relationships, with what we have read, what we have been interested in until we get into the relationship field. Relationships with yourself, relationships with your partner - we learn all this already in practice.

Online courses and video lectures prepared by professionals - psychologists, psychotherapists, family psychotherapists and relationship mentors are helpful for the couple in improving their relationship and are available at any time.

For a couple, cooperation skills are vital for a relationship to survive and develop respectfully. One of the most useful skills for building loving and successful relationships is the ability to resolve disputes. If we both really understand what the disagreement is, then it is quite difficult to even come to an argument. With the word "dispute" we imagine a quarrel, often even an effort to prove one's right. However, it shouldn't be. If we understand what is happening, that is, we simply have disagreements, or different views, visions, then the resolution of disagreements does not develop into disputes, but into constructive, respectful conversations.

How to prevent and solve conflicts, how not to offend the other and remain heard, as well as empathically teach to listen to the other - such knowledge, which can be applied later in practice, can be obtained in valuable video lectures and online courses. These are offered, for example, in training on the Open platform, where Ansis Jurģis Stabingis presents a mindfulness-based approach to conflict resolution, including practical exercises for better and better resolution of external and internal conflict situations.

Everything always starts from you!

This lecturer has prepared another wonderful lecture - how to learn to forgive. We all make mistakes. Also in the relationship and attitude towards a girlfriend, boyfriend, wife or husband. But knowing that we are people who are always in process and development is very helpful in situations that have crossed our boundaries. And it does not necessarily have to be some particularly unpleasant and truly unacceptable behavior. It can be insufficient presence at the moment when you needed it, it can be the most unkind word said at the moment when the other party felt destroyed and therefore the contents of the cup of emotions want to spill over the edges. At this point, the power of forgiveness is the path to an even closer connection.

Also, the nature and mission of man and woman, as well as sexuality, are exciting topics to study and explore together in order to expand your vision and find new material for development. Philosopher Vents Sílis offers to study masculinity and sexuality on an intelligent, in-depth level, inviting both women and men to watch the lectures. What exactly is masculinity? You may get useful answers to this question by learning four masculine archetypes that describe an adult, harmonized and mature man.

On the other hand, if you are looking in the direction of psychological explanations, it will be valuable to listen to the video lectures of family psychotherapist Vita Kalniņa on how to fight and mend nicely for a couple. As the Lynn Center for Family Psychology says on its website, “Couples therapists believe that nearly half of couples who decide to divorce could have stayed together if only they had known the important basics of cohabitation and relationships.” Isn't that an obscene amount? These observations confirm how important the art of communication and the ability to understand oneself and other people are.

Learning about relationships in books

In autumn evenings, you just want to curl up in a comfortable blanket, cover yourself with a soft blanket and read a book. While personal development mentor and author of LĪGAVĀM relationship-themed articles Zane Ozoliņa is working on publishing her book in a tangible format, you can explore relationship issues together in her e-book "Relationship pyramid. How to build relationships from dating to marriage."

On the other hand, a treasure chest of foreign authors can be found in the list of books recommended by psychologists and therapists compiled by The New York Times "Books that will make your relationship stronger" . 

It selects books such as The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide From the Country's Foremost Relation Expert by John Gottman and Nan Silver. The book offers practical advice on how to strengthen relationships. dr. Gottman, along with his wife Julia Gottman, has been studying couple relationships for decades. In the book, together with co-author Nana Silver, he discovers what unites couples whose relationships survive, and what couples break up.

On the other hand, the book "Come as You Are" by Emilija Nagoski offers a new, science-based way of thinking about sexual well-being. The book was also published in Latvian under the title "Love who you are".

Couples Retreats

Joint growth for a couple is an essential factor for the relationship to grow not only in breadth, but also in depth - a deep connection, empathy, understanding, conscious vision of oneself and the relationship, not only on a psychological level, but also on a spiritual, soulful level. From time to time, retreats for couples are also offered in Latvia, but abroad, where the culture of retreats and spiritual self-growth has flourished, they can be found almost in any month of the year.

You can choose not only specialized retreats for couples, but also any other themed consciousness-expanding and healing retreats and meditation practices to promote spiritual awareness together.

Learning about tantra, which you can learn from masters in Latvia or abroad, as well as by visiting tantra festivals and retreats, will bring a completely new breath to your relationship. Tantra is not equal to sex. A deeper understanding of sex is only part of the tantric worldview. Tantra is the teaching of relationships and bringing relationships into a spiritually rich bed.

Dance and sports

If you are looking for a more moving activity, you can look in the direction of dance classes. They will enrich relationships and bring new, exciting feelings into your everyday life, besides, dance brings you closer and unites you. Let's take a look at some of the options for ideas!

Ballroom dancing for adults. In ballroom dance courses for adults, you can learn both standard ballroom dances and hot-blooded Latin American dance rhythms. It is an exciting activity for long-term couples, adding a new spark to the relationship, as well as a relationship development tool for new couples and a very practical necessity if you want to delight your wedding guests with a specially created wedding dance. You can choose dance courses to your liking - if you are looking for a group of like-minded people and socializing, then it is best to attend dances together with other dance course lovers, but if you want a more private atmosphere - then private courses under the guidance of a professional dance instructor.

Bachata for couples. If you want to capture a more fiery mood in your dances, the sensual couple dance bachata is suitable. Learning the basic step and the main elements of bachata means learning to dance without a partner.

Salsa for couples. Passionate salsa invites you to move to the energetic rhythms of Latin America, and also trains the man's leadership skills. In salsa, you can experience not only the shared joy of dancing, but also gorgeous emotions.

Article author: Ieva Simanoviča